• thelegallybrunette

Making the move: the transition from country to the city. #travel #moving

I'm leaving today. I'm living it, leaving it to change...

It is never easy to move on. Whether it's from a broken heart, a place you've lived for so many years, leaving dear friends behind, or even the memories of the experience of a lifetime.

Over a year on and it is still playing on my mind, even with all the opportunities that have come my way since moving from Cork to Dublin, the capital city, the "Big Smoke", the land of better chances.

It sometimes plays on my mind when I return from a trip back to my family, preparing for another week of study in Blackhall, taking stock of the time spent being back in the place I called home for so long, while never once forgetting my roots.

One might say that I did not have to leave. I could have stayed in the safe, familiar place that, to remain steadfast in the home made by my parents, with its memories, both good, bad and in between.

But it wasn't to be. It was time to spread my wings and take flight.

The decision was quite a painful one, but even in a place called home, if there is no opportunity to stand on your own two feet, to have to keep relying on those closest to you for constant, validating support, when your home becomes a place of plaguing worry rather than comfort.

The same questions would repeat like a mantra in my head: What's going to happen to me? Will I ever make my own home? Will I ever achieve my true potential? Will I ever move on from this?

There are many others, from my generation and the next who do not have to chance to live at life like I did. Whether through financial or personal circumstances, the fixed points of geography, a crucial family matter, or simply the world being too cruel, it is often the lucky ones who make it through to crowning success.

It can be scary. It can be difficult. It can even be overwhelming.

Looking into the distance, she contemplated... is that a rauncloud over there?

But thankfully, I have emerged on the other side of that terrifying period to a brighter future, but that is to say that not every day is a perfect, glowing dream. There are challenges to face, hurdles to overcome, new fears to come to light, but that is all part of life.

An excellent quote by the late American jazz saxophone player, Coleman Hawkins, sums up what it truly means to even try to overcome such difficulties, "If you don't make mistakes, you aren't really trying."

To even try and fail means that something has been done, rather than standing still and doing nothing.

There are many people to whom I am extremely grateful who are carried in my heart each day and who always remind me to never forget where I came from.

There are those who have taught me hard lessons, who may have worn me down once upon a time, but have made me stronger.

There are those who I have met who have made their own contributions to my life, who have affected my outlook in a better way.

There is a place that I came from that will always be home for me, that nurtured me and gave me the all important start that was needed, and that will never be forgotten.

The happiness that I feel each day was hard-earned, and is something that is close to contentment, knowing that my choices have brought me to this point, and that no amount of asking 'What if?' will change that.

Chasing a dream can be frightening, but in the end, it is the will to continue, a positive mental attitude, and the support of others that makes it possible.

If ever I need to return to those wide open spaces, all I need to do is catch a bus or a train, to look out the window at the vast fields passing by in bright vivid colour, and that it when I know that true peace can be found.

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